I am alive and well

Here’s a Letter to the Editor in The News, Pakistan:
“It is indeed shocking to know through an article which appeared in your newspaper on September 27 titled, ‘The Taliban and the Salarzais,’ by Farhat Taj that I am dead and that the ISI is responsible for my killing. It is to bring to the notice of all that I am very much alive and can be contacted on telephone number 0300-7044755. It is highly regrettable that the news of someone’s death is published without verification. The writer must apologise for the trauma caused to my family and well-wishers.”

Malik Munasib Khan
Spokesman, Salarzais Lashkar
Bajaur Agency

Should anyone want to verify if this person is alive, he can use the phone number provided. We live in modern times, even in Bajaur Agency, clearly!