How to win at dating game

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ANI Melbourne
Last Updated : May 26 2013 | 3:30 PM IST

A new book has offered some simple steps to help you win at the dating game.

Blogger Kelly Williams Brown's new book, Adulting: How to Become a Grown-Up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps, is a sensible, whimsical and downright funny guide to navigating the real world.

And News.com.au has revealed some of the book's best advice on how to get love right.

Try to go on at least a couple of actual dates, the book said.

The first few dates are a time to circle each other, sniff cautiously, make sure no one is planning on making a suit out of anyone else's skin, and then commence the process of getting to know each other, it suggests.

No need to reveal your deepest, darkest bits on the first few dates, but you should disclose any relevant health (STD) issues before you have sex, according to the book.

Don't assume you're dating exclusively unless you've discussed it, it said.

The book also warns against the dangers of New Boyfriend Narnia, and suggests limiting disappearance in the beginning of the relationship.

Although you may be so, so deeply and significantly in love in ways no one else could ever understand, the book asks you to remember that your friends still want to see you, your mum still wants you to call, your work still wants you to show up, your cat still wants to be fed.

Do all the things you usually do, so that you may sail away on your dreamboat without guilt once those duties are met, it added.

Your significant other is not your best girlfriend, the book noted.

One person can never be everything to someone else. So talk about things that interest both of you, feign semi-interest when the other one goes off on something unbearably boring, and eventually, gently re-route the conversation.

And pay attention when they're re-routing you. If they aren't giving responses when responses should logically be given, that means they're hoping you'll move on, it stated.

Sometimes you'll date someone because of how hot your friends think he or she is, or their status in the community, or how rich they are, or whatever outside rubric applies.

This is not the right thing to do, the book said.

Date someone because of who they are and how they make you feel, not because of the external stuff, it advised.

While dating, the book said, ask yourself if you could happily chat with this person when you're 80.

Say what you want in bed, without shame or fear, the book suggested.

If this person is a decent guy or girl who cares about you, they'll want to know how to make you happy in bed. If they don't care about what kind of time you're having, that's a good sign this isn't someone you should be having sex with, the book said.

But the only way they'll know what you want is if you tell them, either non-verbally or, if it's something a little more complicated, verbally, it added.

Also the book says have frank discussions about possible consequences of sex with the people you're sleeping with.

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First Published: May 26 2013 | 2:50 PM IST

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