Great eggspectations

"I think I should go abroad," I overheard one unit of India's much-vaunted "demographic dividend" telling his friends. The twenty-somethings were walking on the tree-lined road just across the brick-red hostels in the country's premier university in the capital.

I thought it strange to find that someone should be wanting to leave the country when things seemed to be looking up, right from the prospects of its becoming a pure, clean nation to its boosting its national wealth with the return of all that moolah lying in cold vaults in Switzerland. But, as is their wont, the young have a mind of their own, a vision of their own, a logic all their own.

"But what is wrong with India?" questioned a pretty young thing. "I think we owe it to our country to work for it, especially us, the educated ones."

"Yes, that is all right," replied the boy with that faraway look. "But seriously dudes, I have just been thinking… this past few weeks I have been following the Indian Super League, yes, I love Kolkata, that's the team I am supporting, you should see the way Luis Garcia and Fikru Teferra and Borja Fernandez play…"

Before he could continue further on the ways of the footballers from Athletico de Kolkata, another of the group stopped him testily with, "Yes, yes, we know. But you were telling us why you want to go abroad."

"Oh yes. Dudes, see how these matches are so much better than the ones that the Indian team plays. And you know why?" He paused for that dramatic moment to unveil a profound truth. "It is," he continued after five seconds, "all because they have foreigners playing."

The others just looked at him as if he had lost his marbles. So he pleaded, "Just consider. Isn't it because they are foreigners that they play so well? And remember, they are all close to their 40s. Yet they are running around for 90 minutes without giving the impression, like we Indians do, that the paneer they had for lunch had surrendered its last amino acid 40 minutes ago and had nothing left to sustain them for the next 50 minutes. Where would we Indians be at age 40? The only running we do at that age is to the loo every time we eat anything that isn't cooked by our mothers."

Though still sceptical, the youngsters had to admit there was some substance in that line of thinking. "Yeah, I think so," admitted one plump fellow. "It's the food they eat, the healthcare they get and the importance they lay on physical culture."

"The main thing is they have a vision and they set targets, we Indians don't," a geeky one contributed. Eager now to join in the debate, a girl said in a lively tone, "Look at the work culture too. Have you read about the Google office? I believe it is like Alice's Wonderland, all designed to ensure you don't get bored to death by the routine of doing the same thing every day."

All this while, another young lady had remained silent, though a Mona Lisa smile played around her lips. "Well," she finally said, and all heads turned towards her. "I have planned like a foreigner does. I will be working for either Apple or Facebook as soon as we are through with our course."

She answered their quizzical looks with confidence. "If you look in the freezer compartment of our refrigerator, you will find a carton of eggs there, and I have got the organic ones with extra yellow yolks," she explained. Seeing the still puzzled looks around her, she said, "I don't know why, but Apple and Facebook will hire women who freeze eggs ... America, here I come."

Free Run is a fortnightly look at alternate realities
joel.rai@bsmail.in