Struggle to fit the mould? The 'otrovert' personality explains why

With shifting social norms and hybrid lifestyles, the otrovert concept resonates with those who are connected yet never quite conform.

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You enjoy socialising, but only on your terms. You like people, but you don’t always feel you belong. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone, and experts say you may be part of a newly identified personality type called the “otrovert.”

 

The term was coined by US psychiatrist and author of the book ‘The Gift of Not Belonging’, Dr Rami Kaminski. Unlike introverts or extroverts, otroverts are not defined by where they draw their social energy. Instead, the concept captures people who constantly feel like outsiders, and tend to look in a different direction altogether, not necessarily aligned with the rest of the group.

 

How otroverts differ from others 

• Introverts often recharge in solitude and can find large groups draining.
• Extroverts seek energy from being around people and thrive in busy social environments.
• Ambiverts comfortably swing between both worlds depending on the situation.
• Otroverts may talk and interact freely, but they remain emotionally independent, and often feel like outsiders even in spaces where they are welcomed.
• Unlike ambiverts, who adjust with ease, otroverts maintain a sense of distance from group identity.

 

Traits that define an otrovert 

• Always prefer to get together with a friend one-on-one rather than in a group.
• Not likely to throw parties and generally avoid group celebrations of any kind.
• Prefer sports and activities where they can compete individually.
• Are always observers rather than true participants.
• Prefer to stand out than to fit in.
• Don’t like mixing people from different realms of life, even if those people know each other.
• Don’t feel an affinity with a particular sports team, an alma mater, or a company they work for.
• Stand by their opinions and conviction if asked to weigh in on something at work, and aren’t swayed by the opinions their colleagues have expressed.
• They are specialists rather than generalists, with interests and skills that run narrow but deep.
• Despite having differing points of view, otroverts are not combative or argumentative; rather, they come across as polite, friendly, and even outgoing.
• Are confrontation-averse and considerate, sometimes to a fault.
• Have trouble being relaxed and themselves in public, no matter how common the situation.
• Can be confident and charming when they have an assigned role because their sense of being displaced is mitigated.

 

In his writing, Dr Kaminski notes that otroverts are not usually socially anxious. In fact, many are well-liked, even popular. What sets them apart is their reluctance to conform to group norms. Instead of seeking approval, they rely on their own judgement, making them emotionally self-reliant and often “fiercely independent”. This absence of a strong “communal impulse” has been observed, he says, across cultures, ethnicities and genders. 

 

Why this label strikes a chord 

The emergence of the otrovert label shows a growing recognition that personality is not always neatly divided. In today’s hybrid lifestyles, shaped by remote work, fluid identities and shifting cultural boundaries, many people feel disconnected from strict categories. For them, the otrovert concept offers validation.

 

Critics urge caution 

Behavioural analysts also warn against rushing to adopt a new label. Some experts caution that the term may be too broad, grouping together experiences that could just as easily reflect anxiety, neurodivergence, cultural differences or natural personality variation.

 

Research on the subject is still limited, with most references so far coming from expert commentary, opinion pieces and early academic work rather than large-scale peer-reviewed studies.

 

It is okay to not ‘fit-in’ 

For people who often feel on the fringes, social enough to mingle, independent enough not to blend in, the otrovert tag may bring comfort. It does not seek to confine, but rather to acknowledge that not everyone finds belonging in the same way.

 

“Non-belonging is normal for otroverts and need not be corrected. Instead of learning to belong, the otrovert’s goal should be to understand their true strengths and limitations and, in doing so, develop a keen appreciation of themselves,” wrote Dr Kaminski in the Financial Review.      For more health updates, follow #HealthwithBS