How to make a toast

It was Dale Carnegie who said, "There are always three speeches for every one you actually gave. The one you practiced, the one you gave, and the one you wish you gave."

Most of us know how frustrating it is to deliver a staggeringly brilliant speech to the showerhead in the tub beforehand, only to have your actual speech a mind-numbing string of "ahhs" and "ums" with the occasional "er" to break the monotony.

If the thought of having to make a toast keeps you up at night, don't worry "" we've put together a few snappy tips to make the next occasion much smoother.

Know what you're going to say. This seems obvious, but so many people think that they can just shoot a witty, moving toast off the cuff.

If you're wondering whether you're one of these people, or whether you need something written out, here's a quick rule of thumb: you need something written out.

Don't write out a whole speech and then just read from it, but use flashcards to remind you the order in which you want to say what you want to say.

Make sure you practice often: this will help you know how long you will be speaking for (ideally, toasts should last only for three or four minutes), and how you sound out loud. An audience also helps; ask your mum to sit in, safe in the knowledge that she'll be kind.

On the actual day, make sure everyone has a filled glass before you begin, you don't want people to scramble around for refills after you've taken a deep breath and launched into it.

Face the person you're toasting and raise your glass to him. Look at the person as you're making the toast, and after you're done, wave your glass to all and tip towards or, if you're close enough, clink the recipient's glass.

Take a sip of your drink (don't down the entire glass, even if the speech didn't go too well) and sit down.

Toasts are far less intimidating than public speeches, since you will usually be speaking to people you know, and therefore you can (and should) keep it informal, light and personal.

If you're giving the toast at a wedding, remember to say something nice about the happy couple and how you know them, and although he carried it off with great aplomb, don't take any tips from Hugh Grant in Four Weddings and a Funeral.

Sudhir Sharma of the Delhi Chapter of Toastmasters International has a few tips as well.

He would advise you to know your audience (don't use many inside jokes that only you and a few other people share, no one will have a clue what you're talking about and many will assume that you've had too much to drink), have a strong opening (something that grabs attention away from other conversations people might be having), and an open-ended conclusion.

If, despite all these great tips, you trip up in the middle, try to laugh and move on. And if you trip up all the way through, cheer up and remember that old Wodehouse gag about public speaking: it is human to er.